Don’t be afraid to say THANK YOU during a negotiation

As we begin the holiday season with Thanksgiving celebrated recently in my native America, giving thanks is on people’s minds. I am thankful for my health, for my family, I am thankful I can be in touch with all of you. Giving thanks is an important part of being human. 

Saying thank you is also an important part of the negotiation process, particularly in a collaborative negotiation. People tend to shy away from it and that’s a big mistake. 

We have trained thousands of people over the years at Merindol Negotiation and one aspect of negotiation we like to stress is the importance of negotiation flow. The back and forth, the dance, the taking and giving, the conditional trading, movement. 

People often believe that movement is bad, that it is a sign of weakness. But on the contrary, outcomes will improve if you move, if your negotiation flows. 

Negotiation is like a river. It must flow. A river that flows is clear, fresh with multiple destinations. A river that is dammed, stagnates and becomes static and murky. A negotiation that doesn’t move, dies. 

One of the best ways to get the other party to move is to move yourself. Make a pre-planned concession, but always make it conditional. They will mirror you. Here’s an example: ‘If you can speed up delivery times by 25%, we’ll improve payment terms by 14 days’

And when THEY make a move, a concession, reward them for it by saying THANK YOU.  Don’t say ‘no, that’s not enough’ – say ‘THANK YOU, we’re making progress’.

Reward movement – you want them to do it again. A simple thank you is encouraging. It is not a sign of weakness.

So, in summary follow these simple rules:

• Think of negotiation as a river – keep it flowing, movement is good;
• Move – by moving, there is a good chance they will mirror you and reciprocate with a move of their own;
• Say THANK YOU when they move – it will motivate them to move again.

Karim Davezac is Co-Founder & Managing Director of Merindol Negotiation.

To learn more about how we are supporting clients to get the best possible outcomes from their negotiations, please contact us at info@merindolnegotiation.com or visit our e-brochure.